Can I come back?

Out into the backyard for a few minutes to do backyard type things. Although rumour has it that it is Spring, it’s been the dark side of Spring with lots of overcast skies and rain. It was supposed to be sunny and warm today so there I was out in the back yard waiting for evidence of both. There wasn’t any.   Looking up, it seemed as if rolling hills of clouds went on forever. Not only that, they were moving slowly eastward across the sky where they would either disappear or join other clouds to party in Montreal.

I came back inside and remembered that I had to move something on the front porch and as I opened the front door, I found it: brilliant sunshine. I was confused. So I closed the door and went back to the backyard to check. It was still cloudy. I ran to the front, opened the door and checked. Still sunny. I walked to the boulevard, followed by the curious dogs and looked up at the sky. The dogs shrugged, sat down and pointed their noses at the sky, squinting, wondering what we were doing.

I missed all the meteorology classes I didn’t take, so don’t know what phenomenon I was witnessing, but it reminded me how things can look different depending on where you stand and what you see, and that old thing of belief. To this day I remember being on Toronto Island where it was sunny and warm and watched as it poured buckets of rain on Toronto, across the very small bay.

Which brings me to coming back here after deciding to close this blog.

I made a decision to end the blog for reasons that seemed rational, albeit tinged with emotion because sitting with not knowing or having answers about what I was doing or wanted to do with this blog was driving me a bit nuts. For some reason, I could not just be with this not knowing. Not having a goal for it, or a niche for it. I couldn’t see that if I just waited, or walked to a different place, I would see something different and relax.

Life does change, it’s true. So do minds. And sometimes that change brings you back to a place; in a different way, with different eyes. So I hope you don’t mind, but I’d like to change my mind and come back every now and again.


About FS

Toronto, Canada. Writing about slices of life, the moments and minor details of which come into awareness or out of imagination and the spaces inbetween.
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8 Responses to Can I come back?

  1. ValerieD says:

    Ah… To blog or not to blog… that is the question.
    Bet Shakespeare would have struggled with that one too… 😉

    • FS says:

      Oh my goodness, would we even have a Shakespeare today??

      • ValerieD says:

        That’s a very good question.
        Do you think the 16th and17th century somehow were better times to be a writer? Are our times not conducive to exceptional writing? Too much lenience toward accepting mediocrity in verbal expression?
        What is it that made him stand out and become England’s all-time poet? Was it innate? or circumstantial? Would the same individual born today turn out to be a ordinary man, writing senseless and idiotic ‘scripts’ for reality-TV?
        Is today’s society choking ever bit of creative spirit out of artistic souls?
        Could there ever be another Shakespeare? (if there were, I bet she would be even better)
        Ranting questions of an insomniac brain….
        PS : Hope YOU are sound asleep, dreaming the sweetest of dreams.

      • FS says:

        Hmmmmm good questions. Like all art forms, I think writing has to be looked at in context. Shakespeare was unusual for his times: he made up words, he wrote about universal themes of life that no one had written about in quite the same way: with wit and astute observation of his times and of human nature. For those reasons, plus his brilliant use of words and language, he stood the test of time — although I am not sure that will always be the case. I think Shakespeare’s works are in someways quite timeless, and now, in 2011, a bit out of date. The two anchors of western writing: the Bible and Shakespeare are in need of another prong within the world of literature, an anchor that reflects human nature within the context of technology and changing world realities. At some point, we might need to look at what constitutes literature differently. There’s still a lot of good writing out there once we all weed through the dross. My humble opinion is that there now needs to be a third prong to that anchor, although what that would be…escapes me.

  2. finding my way says:

    No complaint here.

    I just have to revise my last comment to read; …have touched me, will continue to touch me and will always….


    • fs says:

      Oh my goodness, thank you. 🙂 Hard standard to live up to, but a kid can only try.

  3. Terrisita says:

    Welome back!!! Remember when Dorothy opened the door, and said “Toto, I have a feeliing we’re not in Kansas any more”? Simply opening a door can open up a whole new world of inspiration and experience.

    • fs says:

      T: Opening that door … you do know how that is for me. But I’m sticking to my credo of: a kid can only try. Thank you for your welcome.

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